Don’t read this article if you would like to watch Deadpool & Wolverine or Alien: Romulus completely unsullied. Or Total Recall. Or Lord of the Rings. In fact, please go away now!
Trailers have been responsible for ruining a whole lot of movies. More than three decades ago, if you happened to be watching Paul Verhoeven’s classic sci-fi romp Total Recall but had already seen the promo material, you probably wouldn’t have been particularly shocked at the moment when memory-addled Arnold Schwarzenegger guns down his own wife and utters the immortal line: “Consider that a divorce.” Nor would you be surprised to note that Benny the Martian driver is really a mutant, that our hero was once much more than a lowly construction worker, or that Schwarzenegger does eventually release oxygen on to the surface of Mars in the film’s denouement.
That’s because all these moments are either given away completely or heavily hinted at in the trailer. And unfortunately things have only got worse since 1990. This week Marvel boss Kevin Feige was forced to advise fans to avoid watching advance publicity altogether for the studio’s films after the newly released Deadpool & Wolverine trailer gave away one of the meta-tastic movie’s many juicy cameos, in this instance the return of Dafne Keen’s X-23 from 2017’s Logan.
Responding to suggestions during an interview with Blaverty TV that each Marvel movie might be better off with just a single trailer to avoid such issues, Feige responded: “I would be open to it,” adding: “I don’t disagree and I know people who purposely stay away from all marketing. If you’re already interested in the movie, stay away.”
That a studio boss (who implied heavily that he has very little say what ends up in trailers) should be advising fans to avoid advance publicity altogether says a lot about the division between film-makers and marketing teams in 21st-century Hollywood. On one side, we have directors and producers keen to ensure filmgoers experience their visions clean and unsullied, or at the very least without knowing all the key twists in advance. On the other, marketers are desperate to create as much buzz as possible about the movie, and if that means giving away essential plot points, who really cares?
Imagine if some of the greatest twists in Hollywood history had been set up in the trailers, like say, the bit in Ridley Scott’s Alien where a baby xenomorph bursts out of poor John Hurt’s chest on board the Nostromo. What’s that you say, they did more or less the same thing in the new trailer for the upcoming Alien: Romulus? Surely not.
But yep, there it is, in advance publicity. This time an unfortunate space traveller shines a torch on her bulging torso as something horrible can clearly be seen clambering desperately to escape from her rib cage. If we don’t actually see the bloody moment itself, there’s little doubt what’s coming next, and one of the key moments of Fede Alvarez’s forthcoming film is effectively spoiled. Not only do we already know he is gunning to recreate one of 20th century’s sci-fi’s most iconic scenes, before we’ve even had a chance to watch five minutes of the movie, but we know exactly how he’s going to do it, because it’s all there in the blimmin’ trailer. This one’s up there with advance publicity for The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers which somehow contrived to give away the fact that Gandalf didn’t perish at the hands of the Balrog after all in the first film, but has instead been brought back to life with a natty new snowy white hairdo.
Some fans have already complained vociferously about Romulus’s heavy-handed approach to marketing, while others have taken the positive view that if Alvarez is giving away this much in trailers, there must be more impressive plot twists to come. Perhaps this time the xenomorphs speak English in a Brummie accent, or are secretly the offspring of David the android’s pet toads. Maybe this whole set-up is a giant practical joke created by the Engineers, who are watching along on telly as another crew of dumb humans is ripped apart for their Saturday night, galactic prime time entertainment. Possibly Ridley Scott is secretly a lizard guy? There are endless permutations.
At least, on the evidence of his recent horror outings, Alvarez can be trusted to deliver the required scream factor, even if we’ve already seen a fair few of the crucial set-pieces. For those of you primed to see Deadpool & Wolverine this weekend, it’s probably fair to say that the scenes are, if not the entire point of the movie, at the very least a considerable part of the joy. Which probably means you’re really regretting reading this article now. Well we did warn you.
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